Happy New Year 2010!

Exactly a year since the last post, and its the New Year again!

I remember many a time within this past year where I have had the urge to write something on this blog, but somehow laziness or a lack of inspiration would get the better of me. But tonight is different, tonight is the start of a new decade. And I thought I should pen down some of my thoughts.

I remember 31st December 1999 very vividly. I had a piano performance on that night at the Drama Centre @ Fort Canning, 'The Little Prince' it was. The entire family was there to watch the LPT concert, and we ended close to 10pm. It had been a successful concert as far as I remember, my first concert with responsibilities both on stage as a performer, and backstage as stage manager. The family then proceeded to Pasir Ris Park, Fishermens' Village, to countdown with everyone else. My mum's family operated the business there, and many of our relatives were there too. The place was packed and crowded with people all waiting to usher in the New Year by the sea.

Where I was at exactly 0000hrs on 1 Jan 2000, I cannot really remember now. I probably had counted down with everyone else, and wished everyone a wonderful new year, but I do remember going over to the playground subsequently for some peace and quiet. I always liked these moments of quiet reflection, especially at momentous times like the dawning of a new millennium.

We left the park at about 2am, went for a short supper meal somewhere, before heading back to the temporary home at Mariam Way. The original house in Pasir Ris was still being rebuilt at this time. After showering up and everything, everyone had gone to bed, and I switched on my study lights, and startd to pen my memoirs of my life in the millenium that had just passed me by, my life from 1985 to 1999, up till I was aged 14. The entire essay was written in Mandarin (looking back now I cant think of the exact reasons for using it instead of English, but I had a tendency to express more intrspective thoughts in Mandarin anyway). The original copy of it sits proudly in my room to this date, and through the years, I have had more than my fair share of flipping through it just to relive the memories. It was not a short article, but overall, it was a very contented one. I remember being very satisfied with my life, very contented, having no regrets, with little aspirations for the future except that it would hold more of the same.

In the blink of an eye, here we are in 2010. To say the least, it has been an eventful decade. Alot of the things that have happened have been documented here on the blog, in private writings that I keep and in conversations with family and friends. Looking forward to the next decade, I would probably have much more aspirations for myself than I had in 1999, not because I have become less satisfied with my life, but because this past decade has shown me the possibilities one has to bring about a more meaningful life for everyone, including myself.

Looking forward ten years from now, I hope that I will have been able to pursue some of my interests in communication between different groups of people (especially within Southeast Asia), in contributing towards environmentally-responsive food production, and fulfil my responsibilities as a dedicated civil servant in Singapore. On the home front, I wont go as far to say that I will be married come 2020, but that certainly would be an important milestone (considering that for the past 5 years of my life, I have been saying that I would get married at 25!) Marraige apart, the happiness, cohesiveness and good health of the present family has always been top of the priorities and that will always stay.

Looking back at the ten years gone by, I really cant say that it has been as smooth-sailing as the years from 85-99, but what I can say is that it has been every much as meaningful and fulfilling. I remember writing in 1999 that back then I felt as if alot of good things had been thrust onto my shoulders, and all I had to do was take them on and everything seemed to roll on great. This past 10 years since then has been anything but that. I really feel that everything I did, or did not do, was largely to alot of thinking and effort on my part, and on my family and friends. I have never, and will never deny the importance of good luck in my life, and there have been many such moments this decade too. However, in terms of the relationships I have forged with both family and friends, in terms of the work I have done in school and outside school, I wont bat an eyelid to say I put in a real lot of effort to get to where I stand today. And I am proud of that.

If there is one thing that has not changed though since 1999 or even before, it has been my philosophy on how I treat others in life. In 1999, I wrote that regardless of what I did, I only had used my heart with good intentions for all around me, to the extent that it could cause me some frustration even at times. I am overjoyed that despite having seen and experienced so much since then, I can hold my head up high and say I still walk the talk. Honesty and sincerity are still very much the guiding principles of my life, and if there is anything I wish now that stays the same in this decade to come, I will say, let it be my conviction to them.

Happy New Year!