I Laugh Easily!

Today, I will discuss laughter. Actually, I think I am most attractive and charming when I am laughing. When do you laugh? When you feel something is funny, or when you feel nervous, or to cover up some other feelings of yours, or to attract attention? I think we laugh for a whole assortment of reasons. For me, laughter is a single remedy for uncomfortable situations. It seems like there is an auto-mechanism within my brain, that whenever I find myself in a situation that I cannot think fast enough what to say, or what to do, I just start laughing.

I think because of this high propensity to laugh, my laughing technique has taken on a very natural and self-indulgent fashion. This basically means, that even when I am laughing out of awkwardness, to most people, it seems that I am really laughing, and more than that, enjoying my laughing. That however, has the consequential effects of both lightening the tensions around me, as well as allowing me time to think what to say! So try to imagine this, when Cexiang is laughing happily, his brain is actually rushing around saying "Faster! Think ! Say Something! Faster!" Haha, quite a funny thought actually, isnt it.

I think to most strangers, I am quite an unapproachable and cold person, and maybe that is why first impressions of me tend to be quite distant. Now, the reason for that is because I am shy!But when I laugh, immediately, I become someone who seems very friendly. And after that, when I see that people around me are friendlier to me because they see that I am friendly, I tend to be far more confident in my words and actions, and then, I become fully comfortable with the situation and am able to bring out my natural best.

Therefore, I was thinking why I seemed to always have good rapport with audiences be it during performance or presentations, even when I was feeling completely awkward. I found the answer in my laughter. It is the laughter of friendliness, of perceived confidence, the laughter of success. So go on, practice laughing! =p

My Tears Don't Flow Lightly

These past 2 weekends, I have had the entire apartment to myself. The feeling is quite different from last year, when I had my little room to myself all the time as well. I think this feeling of space and comfort actually breeds a greater sense of solitude and loneliness. But to be able to feel 'comfortably lonely' is in someways a blessing, for thought deprived of the joys of human interaction, one is also saved from the stresses of it. More than ever, it provides an environment for thought and contemplation. To some, a retreat in a forest might be the best form of spiritual freedom, but to a less enlightened me, the ants and insects in the forest crawling on me makes it impossible for me to think. So, a nice comfortable room, with carperted floor, the heater blowing lightly and the orange lamp on is better. Today thus, I will discuss the topic of crying. I must warn everyone reading this that it is going to be quite incoherent.

Do you recall the times when you cry? Why did you cry? Why do you cry? Recently, as I was watching the drama serial I blogged about in the last post, I have shed a few tears. But I realise that before I have this sensation to cry, a feeling overcomes me. And this feeling is a familiar one, that is, I can remember this feeling whenever I cried before in the past. So what is the feeling. It is the feeling of being touched. Haha. I cant help but laugh as I type this. You must be thinking, what on earth is he trying to say. Yes, it is quite a ridiculous thing to try to explain.

I think there are two reasons why people cry. The first is when they feel helpless at a certain situation they are in but wish they were not in, the second is when they are touched. But the real difference for me between these 2 types, is that the first requires thinking, while the second doesnt. For the first, when I am in a situation I do not want to be in, my initial reaction is to think what I can do to get myself out of it, if after thinking hard and I cant get out, I cry out of helplessnes. I think that is why I almost have never cried for the first reason, because normally when I think, I am able to get myself out of situations I do not want to be in. The second type of crying though, comes naturally. I just feel touched. And what is it that I feel touched by? I tried to recall all the times I cried because I felt touched, and the same reason cropped up : I felt touched when I see or experience an act of selfless love. And I enjoy the crying.

So, when you are sad, do you cry before you think? Or think first? Do you enjoy crying when you are touched as well, because you can appreciate love then?

An Update

It is nice that quite a few of you still check back on this blog, even though I am updating it less and less. So, let me give everyone what is happening in my life right now. Projects in school have been throttling forward at full speed, and the groups I am in this year are very professional and committed. Therefore, things are going well.

Honestly, I spend most of my time between school and home these days. So maybe, I should share what I do at home. Besides studying, the 2 other things that take up most of my time is watching TVB serials on VEOH and Crunchyroll; and washing the dishes. =p

Why washing the dishes? Because Kaiyi (my housemate) is a real cooking enthusiast. Thus far, we have had steamed egg, roasted chicken, egg fried rice, chicken soup, omelettes, porridge. The list just runs on, and more importantly, he cooks rather well! I have learnt how to cook porridge and steamed egg from him, and slowly I will learn more to add to my current skill of pasta bolognese!

TVB serials. I finished an ancient drama called 'Face to Fate' or ' 布衣神相' which stars Frankie Lam and Raymond Lam. Currently, I am watching ' Heart of Greed' or ' 溏心风暴' which is a 40 episode modern day drama following the fortunes of an abalone franchise-owning family. Raymond Lam also stars here, together with Moses Chan whose roles in the past I did not like but this time his role and acting are really captivating. The matraich of the family is Li Sze-Kei or Runshan from ' A Kindred Spirit'. And the female lead is the very attractive Linda Chung. I have watched till episode 18 thus far. And I will not be afraid to admit this : I am almost driven to tears every 2 episodes. The script writer is fantastic at understanding the dynamics of people and bringing out incidents that really touch the hearts. Anyone who has spent his life being concerned or being stressed about family dynamics, will definitely be very touched. I am not going to give away any of the storyline, but I recommend this show to ALL. You can recommend it from your local VCD rental store. Sit down and watch with your family, and I think we can really learn from it. I would love to discuss it with anyone once you have watched it!

Alright. This will be it for my short update. Continue smiling, and bringing happiness to everyone in your life! =P

Onboard BA 0012

This must be the emptiest plane I have taken in my life. Imagine this - all economy class passengers have an entire row of 3 seats to themselves! Most of them have made full use of the opportunity, pulled up the individual seat dividers, and lie down to sleep across the seats. Not too bad at all for Economy class ticket for a 13hr flight from Singapore to London.

I will be heading right away to class upon reaching Cardiff Central Railway Station, kicking off the final 5 (but strictly only 4) weeks of the Autumn Semester. Within this period, I will have to finish my site plans (by this Wednesday), a debate on Environmental issues, and a presentation on a new Airport proposal along the Severn Channel.

The last week was spent in Singapore. Spent most of my time at home with my family, but found some time to meet up with the closest of friends as well. Starting at home, we had quite a few enjoyable nights of Mahjong, with much laughter and joy. I think that is a beautiful way to spend ones’ life.

I met up with Chin Siong individually for supper at Newton and with the trio of Yisheng, Wenhui and Haojie at Tampines Mall for Tepenyaki. Chin Siong had a rather interesting way of passing time while waiting to get called up for the Army – reading old newspapers in the library. By óld’, I mean papers from 1959, long before we were born. I wondered why I hadn’t done something like that before, since it surely is a good way to have a feel of how life for Singaporeans was, back then.

Wenhui also made a comforting comment over dinner, as he explained why he is less of an active student now than in the past. He said he realized that as he sees his parents and grandparents grow older, his priorities in life have changed, and perhaps, getting the best results or being the most active student in school isn’t all that important anymore after all. I replied that he had been enlightened.

The Importance of Education in Singapore

I read from one of my young student's blogs on why she needed good academic results. It ran along the lines of "Singapore is not like some other country where just any skill can earn you money." I do not think she heard this from anyone else, and it is probably her personal opinion. For a young 13 year old to think like that, I find it very admirable. If only all young Singaporeans have the same think

My opinion, is that perhaps, in other parts of the world, just being able to do something, a decent low-skilled job for example, would allow you to go about life well enough. Even now in Singapore, that is probably true. Unfortunately, I doubt it will be true for much longer, most probably not for my generation, and definitely not, for the next. As soon as Singapore chose the path the high-paced development, to be the metropolis of South-East Asia, I think we very much faced 2 possible scenarios.

The first - develop high-end service, manufacturing and research industries, accomodate as many of our own people who have acquired the necessary skills, fill in the remaining gaps with foreigners. The parallel phenomenon - those that are unable to obtain these jobs because of a lack of skill, will have to do with the few remaining low-skilled jobs that will increasingly pay comparatively lower than the rising costs of living. The outcome - Singapore becomes like the New York or London of today, with increasingly rich people working in the booming high-end sectors, and the increasing socially marginalized poor who are unable to get the jobs and unable to afford decent housing. The remedy - These poorer Singaporeans who are unable to keep up with the costs of living either bear with their constantly worsening conditions, or migrate to a neighbouring country where costs of living are lower and they can get relatively higher paying jobs for their level of skills.

The second scenario - which is really similar to the first, except that here, with large emphasis on the education system, almost all Singaporean students are educated to a certain level where they are equipped with skills that will allow them to not only contribute in the high-end sectors back home, but are also highly sought after internationally. The outcome -many of these Singaporeans will then have the opportunities and choices to migrate or work elsewhere in the world where they may get even higher renumeration.

Perhaps in the long run, many of the current Singaporeans will leave the country. But I would much rather they leave for the second scenario, rather than reasons for the first. As a country in today's globalised world, I think Singapore is too small to maintain all different sectors. From the start, we already did away with the argricultural sector due to space constraints, I think in the near future, we will soon do away with the low-end and low-creativity manufacturing sectors as well due to international competition. What about the arts and sporting sectors? I think you could survive in it, only if you were of an international standard. I doubt the government can continue to subsidise just local or regional-level atheletes for much longer. Maybe if Singapore went into an agreement with Malaysia, such that our citizens can work there without barriers, and transport links between the countries are improved, then we could still support relatively low-skilled workers. But that would have many political implications.

So, to cut the long story short, I quote again, "Singapore is not like some other country where just any skill can earn you money." So, study hard, my dearest family and friends.